You watch him walk into the room. Shoulders back, head held high, large smile on his face as he greets the people he passes by. He’s not the most handsome person you’ve ever seen, but there’s something about him that makes you want to know him. That something is the quality known as confidence.
The same thing applies to us, ladies. There’s something about a confident woman that’s so unbelievably sexy. But what is it? Is it societal programming? Some sort of primal instinct? Actually, it’s a bit of both.
Let’s talk about the purely physical aspect for a moment. A confident woman, whether she’s in heels or flats, a skirt or jeans, is a force to be reckoned with. She walks with a spring in her step, has great posture, greets the world head-on. People gravitate to her because they want to glean from her energy, they subconsciously want to soak up some of her strength. Also, from a very basic perspective, good posture highlights the natural curve of your body, accentuating your bust line and making your legs look longer. Essentially, confidence, on a physical level, works like a great pair of heels without the pain of having to wear them.
On a societal level, confidence is attractive because we tend to favor those who are comfortable in their own skin – the charismatic extrovert archetype. Confidence is sexy because it is the aspiration, the ideal state for many people. But for a lot of women, displaying confidence, let alone having confidence is difficult.
I’ll let you in on a secret. It doesn’t have to be.
All it takes is a bit of effort toward changing your thinking. Start at home with just yourself and a mirror. Look at yourself in the eyes and say to the person you see: “You are beautiful and you are worth it.” Keep saying it to yourself until you believe it (because guess what? It’s true.) Then, the next time you go out in public, fight the urge to slump your shoulders and watch your feet as you walk. It may be hard at first, and you might sink back into old habits, but keep trying until it becomes natural.
Now, here’s something important to remember, when you are in the process of building self-confidence, the last thing you need is people around you who are going to reduce your efforts by being negative. Remove these people from your life, they are only harming you. Instead, surround yourself with people who say the positive things you are beginning to say to yourself, and the process will become so much easier. Now, here’s something important to remember, when you are in the process of building self-confidence, the last thing you need is people around you who are going to reduce your efforts by being negative. Remove these people from your life, they are only harming you. Instead, surround yourself with people who say the positive things you are beginning to say to yourself, and the process will become so much easier.
